I Don't Know How To Love Him
by eponinenjolras
Summary: "Enjolras, mon ami, we are getting you laid!"
1. I

**I.**

Courfeyrac marveled at the size of the national library he dare not enter before unless it was of absolute importance. With the amount of people inside, he thought it would be difficult to find Enjolras, but his majesticgold hair with gentle curls, as Courfeyrac often pointed out, practically lit up the Oval. Carefully concealing his presence, Courfeyrac crept from behind him then put his right arm over Enjolras's shoulder and his left hand on the desk to keep his balance. Enjolras jolted a little then dropped his pencil and in an instant buried his face in his palms.

"Courfeyrac, what do you want?" whispered Enjolras through gritted teeth and behind his palms.

"Today is a very special day, young man," announced Courfeyrac, being inconsiderate that he is in a library.

"Tone down your voice, God damn it!" said Enjolras in a loud whisper.

"No, God will damn you if you don't hear me out," Courfeyrac's voice, unchanging.

"Can't this wait until five? This report is due on Friday," said Enjolras, still whispering.

"And today is Wednesday, now come on, hear me out," said Courfeyrac, still not giving a damn about the fact that he is in a library.

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"No."

"Yes—fuck!" Enjolras was quite taken aback that despite the fact that he was whispering the whole time he was the one who received simultaneous shushing and not Courfeyrac.

"Alright, let's get out of here," Courfeyrac beamed. He retracted his arm from Enjolras's shoulder then picked up his notepad and books for him then proceeded to exit the place. Enjolras followed behind him in defeat.

It was cloudy when they were walking outside; Enjolras walked alongside Courfeyrac and has not uttered a single word to him since standing up from his chair in the Oval. Unable to handle the unmovable smile on Courfeyrac's face, Enjolras broke the silence off.

"What exactly are you horrifically smiling about?" he asked. Courfeyrac did a smooth turn to face him and answered,

"Tonight, Enjolras, tonight!" Courfeyrac slammed Enjolras's things on his chest to return it to him. His things opened like a fan against his chest, luckily nothing fell off. Courfeyrac already walked on ahead while Enjolras was balancing on his left leg, letting his other leg's knee rest against a wall as he fixed his things on his thigh. After fixing everything, he looked back at Courfeyrac and he was still walking ahead. Enjolras rolled his eyes and chased after him.

"What exactly is going on tonight?" Enjolras puffed.

"You've let your books go to your brain, Enjolras!" said Courfeyrac while shaking his head. "It's your birthday!"

"Oh," he murmured. Enjolras deemed himself too old for looking forward to his birthdays; he only ever acknowledges it when he glances on his driver's license. Despite Courfeyrac constantly being a pain in the neck, he was a good friend.

"So we've been planning," Courfeyrac began.

"Oh Jesus, no," the taboo words that are, _we_ and _plan_, never fails to fill Enjolras with paranoia.

"Come on, we're all far from our families and we've only got each other to celebrate our birthdays!"

"I'd rather celebrate alone than to put up with you guys scheming on my birthday thank you very much,"

"Alright, _scheming_, synonymous to _plan_ but with a more negative approach," Courfeyrac placed his right hand on his chest and pouted, "You hurt me Enjolras, you really do."

"Courfeyrac,"

"Just trust us on this, everything's going to be awesome, everyone who's anyone's going to be there, everyone's getting wasted—"

"Wasted? How is that different from any other day we spend drinking?"

"Correction, we drink, you brood in your chair and you drive our drunken asses back to our dorms, which we are very grateful of, so it's your turn to actually have some fun!"

"I'm not sure I'd like your meaning of fun,"

"Enjolras, please, let your majestic golden curls down once in a while,"

"Alright fine! Just… don't say that ever again."

"Deal," Courfeyrac held out his hand and Enjolras hesitantly shook it. "We'll pick you up later tonight, so go get ready, wear something nice, and by nice I don't mean prudish, got it?"

"Yes."

"Enjolras, _mon ami_, we are getting you laid!" Courfeyrac yelled out as he strode away, leaving Enjolras red in the face as he hears men snickering and ladies giggling.


	2. II

**II.**

"I told you to dress nice," said Courfeyrac as he got out from his car. Enjolras stepped out from the car, as soon as Courfeyrac closed his car door. Enjolras sighed and said,

"I did," then closed the car door almost in a slam.

"Easy on the car! Jesus!" snapped Courfeyrac, "Anyway, no that red sweater vest does not scream nice, stick with me or you'll be mistaken as a valet." Courfeyrac trotted ahead and Enjolras followed behind.

"You could've told me we were going to a club," said Enjolras as he looked at the glowing neon lights that read, _Musetta_, "I thought we were just going to some pub or café, how did you guys afford renting a club anyway?"

"It's Musichetta's," Courfeyrac answered, "Joly and Lesgles convinced her to give us half off, I dare not ask how." Enjolras raised an eyebrow, and agreed.

The club was packed and Courfeyrac was right, everyone who's anyone in campus was there, but Enjolras didn't believe that they were there for his birthday. Some were dancing to the booming techno music playing all-over, and some were drinking and mingling by the bar at the back end of the area. As Courfeyrac and Enjolras passed by, some of them waved and greeted Enjolras a happy birthday,

"I don't even know these people," he whispered to Courfeyrac as he gave them brief waves and a forced smile.

"Because you don't give them a chance; most girls here could maybe even want to get in your ants," replied Courfeyrac, "Having fun?" he asked the people as they passed by.

"No one is getting in my pants, not tonight; how do people like you even manage to get women like that, I'm pretty sure you can't just approach them and go 'Hello, I have come to sleep with you,' without offending them."

"Enjolras, _mon ami_, when you have a face and body like mine all you have to do is talk to the lady of your choice and let them do the inviting. You don't have to worry about your looks, you are simply angelic, but don't you go blinding people with your true form,"

"Courfeyrac,"

"Jesus, alright _Ass_tiel, we'll get back to that later, let's just meet up with the guys,"

Courfeyrac led Enjolras to a booth upstairs where the others were. The booth had a one-way view pane where they could see the people below; the room looked more relaxing with the soft white lights lighting the room than the seizure-inducing red, green, and blue lights below. Enjolras hoped Courfeyrac and the others don't push him back out there.

"Happy birthday!" they all chanted merrily as they raised a glass of champagne to Enjolras.

"Happy birthday, Enjolras, hope you liked my little club," said Musichetta, seated between Joly and Lesgles right in the corner point of the white corner sofa.

"Not really my cup of tea but, it's alright I guess,"

"Nice try," she replied. "I know that guy over there and these guys over here forced you to be here."

"On my defense, I did not approve of this," said Combeferre; he was sitting on the sofa's arm.

"You were the first one to donate to this cause, traitor," Bahorel chuckled, hitting Combeferre with a pillow.

"It's just that you all worked hard to plan on this I didn't want it to be a failure," Combeferre retorted, laughing.

"Traitor!" they all said in fits of laughter. Enjolras couldn't help but smile, they were all asses, but they were fun asses and good friends too.

"Alright, alright, everyone shut up; R! Wheel in the cake!" Jehan ordered. Grantaire clasped his hands together and quickly got onto his feet,

"You're going to love this, Enjolras," Grantaire commented then disappeared behind a door to fetch the cake.

"Damn it guys, if this is like in the movies where a half-naked girl jumps out of the cake dancing, I'm out." Enjolras stated.

"Don't worry, it's not like that," Lesgles reassured him.

"We thought about that, but we really want to eat cake," Joly continued.

"Where's Marius?" Enjolras wondered,

"Cosette," they all chimed, giving off goofy grins.

"As expected," Enjolras replied. Grantaire finally came back in the room and was pushing a trolley with a box, two feet in length and a foot in width, covering the cake underneath.

"A birthday cake, sponsored by yours truly," said Grantaire.

"I have a bad feeling about this," Enjolras muttered. Grantaire took the box off and revealed a cake in the shape of a life-size female torso, wearing black lingerie with red trims, covering just until half of the breast, letting the nipples slip and two wicks coming out of them.

"Shit," Enjolras smiled in disbelief, "That's disgusting guys,"

"There's nothing disgusting about the female body, Enjolras," Grantaire pointed out, "Unless you prefer males' which we are all alright about, aren't we guys?" they all nodded in response, still laughing at Enjolras expression.

"What? No!" Enjolras retorted, "I just don't like the idea of eating off Susan Sarandon's body or whatever,"

"Susan Sarandon?" Combeferre asked.

"Oh, I made him watch Rocky Horror once," Jehan commented.

"Aww, don't tell me you don't like it; after I searched high and low for the perfect birthday cake," Grantaire pouted,

"I do appreciate all of this you guys, honestly, just," Enjolras sighed, "No tagging on Facebook, I'm friends with my grandparents," they all cheered then Courfeyrac shouted,

"Light the nipples!"


End file.
